Binge watch

A couple of weeks ago I began watching a family friendly Netflix series called Alexa & Katie. Alexa & Katie are high school freshman and best friends.  The series begins as Alexa is completing treatment for leukemia.  Katie, always Alexa's cheerleader, is ever by her side, even when there is a personal cost to her.  Perhaps it was part re-visiting the high school craziness and adolescent emotions as well as the cancer, but I found it relatable. There was a lot of humor woven into the telling of the story.  It helped me to process my current cancer journey once again. Watch Alexa & Katie | Netflix Official Site

What grabbed me was the message about cancer through the experience of Alexa, Katie, her parents, sibling, and family friends.  Once cancer enters your life, it never really let's go.  It changes how you feel about yourself, your body, and your perceptions of how others see you.  Nearly every thought or activity is influenced by cancer, even when the cancer cells themselves are no longer present, the constant awareness of cancer never leaves.  Some people have cancer, then and it goes into remission indefinitely.  Others, go into remission, but the cancer re-occurs.  My neighbor John had non-Hodgkins Lymphoma and then an unrelated cancer for a total of 4 battles well into his 80's before he passed away.

Cancer colors your perspective, your interactions, your family.  The cancer may stop growing, but the affects never completely leave.  It becomes a time measurement: before cancer, during cancer, after cancer, cancer re-occurrence, as memorable as a birthday or anniversary.

I have also learned that at every turn where cancer has entered my life, the experience has refined me.  Although I am uncertain, sometimes fearful, and frightened, I come to the point of acceptance renewing the transition from self-absorption to peace in the present, and increased awareness of others.  Ironically, in my life cancer is a gift.  Oh, it is still a stress, especially with all the uncertainty, but ultimately it is a refining gift.

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