Up-side-down

Carl Fredericson,  Russell,  Kevin, and Dug

Have you seen the movie UP ?

I can see myself in each and every character.  

Inside I'm the charming grumpy old man looking at life vacillating between ego integrity and despair.   I like to be at home in my routine, and reminisce over memories.  Occasionally I glimpse outside my own world of family and work, only to discover that things are changing all around me. Sometimes I just want to go back inside and close the door.  Other times I look dream of things that have not yet come to pass in my life and wonder if they ever will.  I used to comment that my Mother and Father aged before their years talking "Old" when they were still relatively young.  I'm starting to experience these thoughts more often...and it's unsettling.  My body isn't as active and reliable as it once was but not as decrepit as it may yet become.  Middle age, I guess. 

Sometimes I'm wrapped into the sweetest love story ever with my enthusiastic charming spouse (yes think reverse roles) who brought me into his adventure story and I adopted it as my own.

Other days I am like Russell; struggling between industry and inferiority.  One moment I think I've got things figured out only to discover that I walked right into a situation completely unprepared.  I can be naive, determined, and gullible....(yes Jacquie, some parts of personality are set.)  

I'm also like Kevin always trying to reach my children while being sidetracked on my journey by good intentions or demonic pests, unable to articulate my real wants and desires while hoping for good results.

And finally I am the dog, DUG, who is given voice through a less than typical medium.  I may bark a lot, be distracted easily in other pursuits (think crafts) and blunder with good intentions.  But 

I am loyal, hopeful, and lovable.